Feb 21, 2015

A trip down the Klaine lane



My 21-year-old self would never forgive my present self if I didn't write a post celebrating the Klaine wedding. It's been a while since I cared enough about Glee to write about it, and although the final season has been an improvement, something drastic needed to happen for me to brush the dust off of this blog. And well, Kurt and Blaine got married. It might have been sort of anti-climatic and not at all as satisfying as I used to day-dream back in 2011, but Glee has changed and I have changed and even Klaine has changed, and for the good times' sake, let's make this an occasion!

The Klaine lane is as much about the relationship of Kurt and Blaine, as it is about my relationship with Klaine. I spend the last hour going through my old posts, and it felt kinda warm and fuzzy to remember how much Glee used to mean to me, and how I got so, so, SO excited about Klaine. I picked out some high-lights from what I've been writing about Klaine over the years. Yes, I am feeling quite nostalgic right now.


2x10 A Very Glee Christmas: Oh baby, it might be cold outside, but after watching the scene with Kurt and Blaine I'm perfectly warm from head to toe.


2x16 Original Song: How freaking long did we wait for THE DAMN KISS to happen??

And wasn't it AWESOME?? -- When Blaine was looking somehow enlightened during Blackbird I didn't dare think there was something personal going on and when he came to Kurt later and started talking about emotions and defining moments in life I still kept thinking he was aiming at something boring and he would just finish by saying "So I bought us a new bird and named him Elton and I think we should do 'Can you feel the love tonight' at Regionals, because I'm really into emotions now" and then walking away. But then it actually was what it sounded like, an epic and wholehearted declaration of love, and when the soft music began to play I stopped breathing, and boom, the most anticipated and maybe the most adorable (and if not the hottest, at least in the top 3, definitely) kiss ever seen on television happened. --

Both Chris and Darren played the scene beautifully. Kurt's reactions were delicious, as he slowly began to realize what Blaine was talking about and during the kiss he did this little thing with his hand that I really liked and how you could see that his breath was totally taken away... Sweet. The true master of the scene was still Darren. The was no unnecessary awkwardness at all, and the sincerity he delivered those beautiful lines (that might have sounded cheesy in some other mouth) with was amazing. "Oh, there you are. I've been looking for you forever." Aw, love. And then afterwards he goes a bit embarrased ("We should practice..."), smiling that adorably shy smile, and Kurt answers with that awesomely flirty comment ("I thought we were") and there they go again, and then some idiot thinks it's a good time to cut to the next scene! Er, excuse me? I was watching that! --

What's next? I don't know. But today... Life is good. Everything is beautiful and nothing hurts.


2x20 Prom Queen: Aww. Oh how I love those two.


3x01 The Purple Piano Project: Those two make me feel all nice and warm inside. They should kiss more, though. Come on, Fox, it's not that dangerous.


3x05: The First Time: Klaine-wise, this episode was PERFECT. It was a perfect and significant milestone in the story than began in Never Been Kissed, continued in A Very Glee Christmas, Silly Love Songs, Original Song, Prom Queen, New York, and now The First Time. I loved all the Klaine scenes, and I loved every moment in all of them. I want to talk about them separately, just so that I can repeat the words "perfect", "sweet", "beautiful", and "wonderful" over and over until everyone loses their minds. Ok, I try not to.

Bedroom scene 1: One of my favorites! Actually, I should write that in every single one of these scenes, so I won't point that out from here on. But I loooooved this scene! -- Loved Blaine's random dancing, loved his hands when he made the masturbation comment, loved Kurt's adorable facial expressions, loved how they talk about sex and it's not awkward, and loved, loved, LOVED the cute little smack in the end. I want to eat that kiss, that's how adorable it was. --



Auditorium scene: My favorite scene in the episode, not just one of them! So beautiful and sweet and wonderful and all the other words I promised not to use, and god damn me, but I LOVED IT, I loved it so much, so much that I want to cry or scream or pull my hair out, or something. Those two just make my heart burst. Those two, not only as in Kurt and Blaine and their beautiful and perfect love, but also as in Chris Colfer and Darren Criss, and how they act these things so sincerely and perfectly, and make me go crazy.

Bedroom scene 2: -- I think this was just perfect, with the eskimo kisses and the touch of the fingertips and the condom on the floor and the gentle, loving looks. And I feel like a pervert for wanting to get a glimpse of some of the real action, because actually, it would've been a bit wrong to show something so intimate and special and sacred. And yes, I'm again taking this too seriously and acting like we're talking about real people, and yes, I bet they would've showed something more if only Fox had given them an OK, but damnit, I still think it was perfect and extremely special the way it was. 


3x17 Dance with Somebody: -- I don't think they can go wrong with Klaine; if they do a Klaine storyline, I will probably be a fan of it. I actually wondered if I only like this episode so much because it has so much Klaine in it. OR, do I like Klaine so much because the episodes they are in are always so good? What a paradox!

-- I just love my Klaine. Period.


4x04 The Break-Up: "I wanna sing a song that is really special to me. This is the song that I sang the first time I ever met the love of my life. So Kurt, this is for you." Need I say more? If you said yes, you can just read my mind, about whether or not I think this is perhaps the most moving and definitely the saddest musical performance in the history of Glee, and whether or not I want to build Darren Criss a shrine and officially worship him, and then give Blaine is big hug after patting Kurt in the back. -- Seriously. Sometimes I want to kiss Glee.


4x08 Thanksgiving: The Klaine! The call! The Klall! Um. Anyway! They did it again. I admit to some tearing up. I don't know how they do it... The Glee writers are not often masters when it comes to coherent storylines and love stories that are not cheesy, forced or rushed, so it's a small miracle how Kurt and Blaine just keep hitting jackpots. And it's not only that I blindly worship Klaine. They just always manage to snatch the most realistic and heartfelt moments. This was one of my favorite Klaine scenes, ever! I loved everything about it, from the tones of their voices, to the look in Blaine's eyes and the giggle when Kurt jokes about the mouse, not to mention what they're actually saying. Chris Colfer, Darren Criss, I salute you fine genlemen! Everything is beautiful once again...


4x09 Swan Song: Blaine texted Kurt. Kurt feels bad for Blaine. Happy face.


4x14 I Do: KLAINE! SLUTTY KLAINE!


4x15 Girls (and Boys) on Film(I feel I should use a lot of exclamation marks here. Perhaps write the whole thing on CAPSLOCK.) -- I was spoiled about Come What May, which is good, for once, because not being prepared for that might have caused some irremediable emotional damage. A bit like the damage that those flashbacks caused me. Flashbacks. A Moulin Rouge! song. Blaine in a suit. Kurt in a suit. Fake snow. Slow-dancing. Slow-hugging. Klaine covering Come What May. I can't even. (I learned that expression on Tumblr, and I think this is an appropriate place to use it.)


4x17 Guilty Pleasures: And then Kurt throws the hoop and who catches it if not Blaine... Oh dear, my heart hurts again, but this time it's the right kind of hurt.


5x01 Love, Love, Love: Mostly because of ALL THE KLAINE but other reasons too. KLAINE THOUGH. It is such a beautiful day.

-- I have watched Got to Get You into My Life at least twenty times today. Can't get enough of it! Such a good cover, they sound so great, and they are so beautiful together. The sunglasses. The flirty, goofy dancing. The kiss. The hungry, bodies-slamming-together, please-take-me-now kind of kiss. I am so happy. I need to watch it again.

-- ALL YOU NEED IS BLAINE UM SORRY LOVE. The proposal was so cheesy but so perfect! -- How about the fact that Kurt knew Blaine would propose? How about when Kurt said Blaine makes him feel safe? How about the fact that they went to The Spot at the staircase? How about Blaine's perfect speech? How about 'our hand were meant to hold each other'? How about 'all I've ever wanted to do is spend my life loving you'? How about how Kurt just breathes out 'Yeah, yeah'? It's fucking true love! Kurt and Blaine are perfect, Darren Criss and Chris Colfer are perfect in the way they act Blaine and Kurt, this day has been perfect despite the fact that I'm sick and hung-over, everything is beautiful and nothing hurts! Not even my head, even though it really does hurt. Kurt and Blaine are engaged! Klaine is perfect. I love Glee. All you need is Glee. 


Boy, I kinda used to like Klaine, didn't I? I'd forgotten how intense it got. They did give me quite a lot of happiness. They made everything quite beautiful, and there's nothing bad about that! Reading this stuff still makes me smile! It might make me a bit embarrassed, but it makes me smile, too. Sure, things have changed. Here's what I wrote after The First Time:

I wonder what it's like being normal. I'd guess a normal person wouldn't feel that two fictional people having sex is the highlight of their week. Thus, this week must be very boring for anyone normal. I kind of feel sorry for normal people. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to cherish this glorious moment some more. Isn't everything just beautiful? I swear, the keyboard of my laptop never looked better.

Yes. Maybe I am a bit more normal now? Is that bad? Boring? Have a finally grown up a little? Has having a boyfriend made me unable to freak out over things that used to mean so much to me? How disappointing!

Then again, I also wrote this after the same episode:

(So I loved it more than life. At the same time, doesn't this just make a girl horribly depressed? It began with Disney's infinite happy endings, continued with The O.C., Moulin Rouge!, and Kate and Leo, and now it's Klaine, convincing a poor little girl that this is what real life is like, this is what you'll get too, you'll love and be loved and it will be so epic and beautiful that the whole world will cry out of happiness with you. Thank you, all, for these impossible and unrealistic expectations that just turned one inch more impossible and unrealistic. Haha. The encouraging thought is that when I'll be a sad and fat 60-year-old old maid, I will still be a shameless fan girl, and get all the joy I need out of the joy of fictional characters. Can't you just picture me, sitting on a rocking chair with my seventeen cats, weeping over an episode of season 34 of Glee.)

Ok. Whoa. Girl. Maybe this was a bit exaggerated. At the same time, I did really feel a bit that way. Now, being in a real-life, outside-the-Glee-universe relationship has actually done me some good. For one, I was watching the wedding scene today, and I thought, thank god I never need to have such an awfully cheesy wedding. Call it becoming more cynical, call it becoming more realistic, call it becoming more normal, boring, mature, whatever. I like that I know that I don't want a Glee-style wedding. Or a relationship like Klaine. Because, well, it's not real. 

It is safe to assume that nothing fictional will ever again make me feel as warm and fuzzy as Klaine use to do. Maybe that's good. Maybe that's sad, in a weird sense. I always was quite proud about being so attached to fictional characters. Then again, I have to point out that I saw and wrote about the Klaine proposal in September 2013, so not at all so long ago, even though what I've been writing here makes it sound like ancient history. I've been with my boyfriend since October 2013, so, I don't know, someone might just go ahead and say that Klaine was my substitute for a real-life relationship. I'm not gonna say that. Whatever. Klaine was fun. Klaine is still fucking cute! I still enjoy Baby, It's Cold Outside, Come What May, and of course, of course, that epic goddamn first kiss. Can I get a hallelujah.

So anyway. Here'a a high-five to my 21(and 22 and 23 and 24...)-year-old-self. We made it! Klaine made it! I will be very happily watching the final four episodes of Glee, and so help me god, I better weep, because otherwise I will be very worried about my emotional state. Perhaps I'll write more then, and maybe it will be as meta as this post, or maybe it will actually be about Glee. Though my posts were always mostly about me. If this is the last Glee-related post I'll ever do, then bye. Been fun.


Come what may, I will love Klaine until the end of Glee. And probably a little while after that.